It's a SET UP.

Well it is. I really wish I could claim credit to this simple phrase yet credit for my 'nicking' of the truth goes to a dear friend who I know is happy I stole it and simply paying it forward. I blog now in the times we as bloggers and writers know only too well...when we are emotional, drunk, giddy, affected, in pain or all of the above, the BEST time. For then the truth shows. People want reality, not in the kind we see on TV where cameras carefully shoot a scene of UNreality, the STAGED kind or what they PERCEIVE we want to see, no, the reality of life as we know it are the people who make our world go round, the ones we NEVER see; the woman in Dominics, Kathy, who I have known for 10 years, who wears the badge with pride; 'happily serving you since 1976' and standing in McDonalds recently as I left Chicago, her work colleague James, just happened to be there for his daily $1 burger  to inform me she was retiring and I just happened to have ONE  copy of my book All Aboard! left in the car from my book signing and I happily gave it to him remembering years earlier how, "One day, Kathy, One day, Ollie's story will be in print..." SET UP. Oh the stories she could tell and how the HECK did Uncle Lou get in on THAT story?!.... or our hairdressers who tend to our tresses while we happily share intimately our lives yet cannot do so with those we love yet how ironic, she knows so and so who just happened to see what-his-face who ALSO was at Aunt Jemima's where Ed lived..and then Ed and Jemima gave to a woman generously and that same woman is now standing on your doorstep.....well, you get the picture.. It's a SET UP. In sharing, giving and simply being while we are here on this often strange yet astonishing journey called life, we are, somewhat without knowing...connecting.... we are crossing paths with individuals and making things happen. At least, it does when we see, when we recognize those amazing moments...those what-ever-you-want-to-call-them happenings....the ah ha! times....the God Winks...I don't care what you call them, yet the times in our lives when something occurs and it allows a stirring in the gut, the soul, the heart, and you...smile...knowing that something kinda weird, yet good just happened. It's a bloody SET UP...and why?...well...because it's a SET UP. It's already DONE and DUSTED. Railroad laid out....tracks SET...destination MARKED. And you my friend, whether you like or not, are on your way traveling down that railroad of life with a great big HONK of the magic engine as it steers you to who knows where yet do so knowing you will arrive, right on time....because whether you are 7, 17, 27, 47 or 107.....enjoy the ride while you can....because the truth of the matter is knowing it's a set up.....and believing in what it means....for then, the true magic happens....

Those Damn Flying Monkeys...

It's a tough call when you're on the yellow brick road of life to rise to what you know, to humbly BE on the path, the journey of who you are, meant to be and not be affected by those damn flying monkeys that when you least expect, turn up and revel in being a nuisance as they try to get you off or at the very least want to leave you wondering if you're going in the right direction. Of course, that's the whole point, the hidden lesson..it's what we do with the monkeys that matters, the choice we make; allow for anger? Bitterness? Jealousy? Or allow for kindness, forgiveness, non judgment and simply let it go...I speak not only for myself here, yet for all humanity because we need reminding and we need it often.  We live in a world where ego is more important than our hearts and feuding and fighting has all but consumed them; where ego has banished forgiveness with a careless wave of the hand, along with arrogant PRIDE who doesn't give a shit. FEAR has people literally fighting for their own souls, IF they have the guts to go there, most do not, because FEAR and EGO are in cahoots. Joined at the hip. ONE and the SAME. And I can hear those flying monkeys cackling with laughter because they know...they are part of the SET UP of life and the path that we never choose, do not sign up for yet is given..long before we take that first step on the yellow brick road and one moment today was testimony to that. I was at the elementary school that Ollie used to attend and as I chatted to Debbie, one of the school secretaries, we observed a 2nd grader who was in the sick bay, a place Ollie visited often. She told me how much she enjoyed their quiet conversations as he lay there waiting for me and then with tears in her eyes said, "I will never forget how he would stroke my hand and tell me that he hoped I would ride his train some day because that is what I am going to be Miss Debbie, a train." She recalled he shared this with her several times and had almost forgotten and only now...can she 'see' this innocent and astonishing prophecy.  We do not sign up for our paths in life, it is given.  We may not like it or want it, yet it is ours alone. Ollie knew. I know. And the true MAGIC happens when we HONOR our path. I intend to and welcome the flying monkeys to join me, which if the present human spirit of many out there prevails, will be quite often. The path is never easy yet I walk on regardless...and you can too.

A Trip Down Memory Lane...All Aboard!

Tomorrow I head to Chicago and the burbs for a very SPECIAL trip...and in so many ways. I get to spend time with my son George who lives with his Dad and who I miss dearly and thank the Lord for facebook so I can daily trot over to his wall and see what he is up to without being an intrusive mother:) Recently George participated in the St Baldrick's Fundraiser where he shaved his head and in the process went over his $500 goal of donations in memory of his brother, his team he poignantly titled "Ollie Express". Oof....he shared with me recently that despite it's been 7 years this month since he's been gone, he feels it more than ever, contrary to the old saying that I admit pisses me off when I hear it, of 'time being a healer'. We never fully heal. It just changes and have learnt that what we do with our grief contributes greatly. So proud of my son George and when I see him, shall kiss that beautiful bald head.  It has been almost a year since I left Lifetime Fitness and to be walking through the doors again will be emotional for the six years I spent there was so much more than teaching. Teaching group fitness to me is about connecting...bonding and for the group fitness groupies out there and fellow instructors, I see you nodding your head. You get it.  I recall a year after Ollie's death, my grief all consuming and head buried in writing it all OUT, I had imagined I would never teach again and certainly had no plans to. How could I return to something I was so passionate about when I was dead inside? You know it's funny because in the 20 years I've been in this business, for many of those the father of my children, Pete, considered my then part time teaching something as almost frivolous, could not 'see' what I saw in teaching and would often joke to me about it. Yet over the years he did 'see'. He knew what it was truly all about for me...he got it. Despite we were separated at the time, Pete came over to see me one day where he found me in my usual spot at the computer, dressing gown on, a slovenly mess as my fingers bashed away, forgetting selfishly my other two children as I neglected not only them, yet also myself. He handed me the local newspaper. "You should go audition for this Deb.  It's time." Looking at the newspaper he had circled an ad. Lifetime Fitness were looking for staff for their new facility opening late that Summer. At the time, I barely looked at it, wallowing in self pity. A week later, I came across the ad again when our kitty Ella had lain across it on the floor and picking it up, decided to call. I don't even know why, for I really don't recall actively thinking about it. My journey with my Lifetime Fitness family had begun. The members I came to know and love MORE than just my members gave me MORE than I gave them.  They were instrumental in my healing as a mother. I grew with them, alongside them, and they with me. I shared everything with them, laughter AND tears in Studio 1 and in the cafeteria where we would often sit and chat about life, love and the whole bloody Universe. They were with me when I shared my dreams, my loss, my joy and CHEERED when my son had the Metra Passenger Engine 401 named after him, sought it out, travelled on it, shared their inspirations from it and applauded in class when they learnt my book would be published. They were witness to a dream happening before their eyes.  My Lifetime Fitness WAS and IS and always will be, my FAMILY and to be able to spend some time with them this weekend, both in the class room and at the book signing, on the anniversary of Ollie's passing is a beautiful GIFT and as Ollie himself knows as he flies across the tracks, everything happens when it is supposed to and as always, RIGHT ON TIME:) I am also deeply honored to be the Guest Speaker at a Corporate Breakfast down town Chicago on Thursday morning where I will be sharing my thoughts with around 200 guests, the 'Children's Champions', philanthropists and corporate companies who give generously each year to Children's Memorial, an honor because I finally get to say, thank you. Children's informed me that they have purchased 150 of my books to give as gifts to these wonderful patrons and I await eagerly how it will affect them...the journey continues....and happy am I that I am doing what my Ollie asked...and of course right on time as I type those words I hear a train honking....